Worst Thing I ever did!

 One of the many things that distinguish us, human beings, from animals is our ability to feel emotions. We get hurt; we rejoice and we feel rage but above all those things, our ability to love is what really sets us apart from them. Loving makes us superior to animals. It makes us, humans, unique; furthermore, it can serve as a powerful impetus for us to continue fighting in life. It gives us the determination to pursue the things we want and that determination becomes our unwavering strength. But that very strength of ours is also the Achilles heel of our kin. May it be filial love or romantic love; it only signifies that we consider them in our thoughts which could greatly affect our conviction and decisions in life.

Highschool has played an important role in my life. It taught me loads of stuff and gave me a lot of first times and among those first times which I experienced, one thing changed me. I changed because I loved. It was not just a love for parents and blood relatives; it was romantic love. They say that love is the answer to everything and other touching quotes but I had to learn the hard way that not all of those quotes are true. Yes, I admit, I did some things that brought out the best of me when I fell in love but it also brought out the worst in me. I did a lot of terrible stuff not only to others but also to myself. I was overwhelmed by the rush of emotions that I forgot my priorities in life. I disregarded almost everything—even my own pride. I made a lot of grave errors especially in my schoolwork. I neglected my studies and because of that, instead of getting satisfactory grades, I got depressing marks. The fact that I got low grades didn’t bother me at all. College is more important after all, right? As for me, yes, I was hurting—badly. That special someone could not repay what I was giving. It was heartbreaking but still I continued with my stupidity because of “love”. I was inflicting pain upon myself and destroying my future but I didn’t mind; there are always other opportunities, so I thought. It went on and on like that for months that, without realizing, I was pushing my friends away. I said a lot horrible things to them because they wanted me to wake up. I didn’t listen to any of their advices and got mad at them because they kept bugging me. They said I changed a lot and that they didn’t like it and I just said that I didn’t care. After that confrontation, I was left alone in midair. I got so depressed that I pitied myself. THAT incident was what awoke me from my foolishness. I was starting to realize that I was making a fool out of myself. Seeing the damages that have been made, I lost hope. I was afraid to go to school to face my problems. I was so down; I was SHATTERED to pieces. I had no one to lean on because I shunned my friends for what I thought was right but after many dismal days of being a forlorn, I finally came to light. I just woke up one day and said to myself that I’m going to set things right. I spoke with my friends and after a day of all those dramatic words and stuff with them, I was able to reassemble the broken pieces of me. I was able to see and think straight again. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that love is bad. I don’t blame it for all the mishaps that came in my way. I am just saying that to love without thinking can be very dangerous. It consumes your very being and smears your outlook in life. There is a reason why God placed our brains above our heart. He wants to remind us that we should think first before doing anything; a thought we should all bear in mind.

Because of uncontrolled emotions, I fell into a deep precipice and found myself alone. I felt so vulnerable and weak but also because of that happening I was able to venture into new realms and gained valor to face the woes of my existence. I realized that we only live once. So instead of waiting for a storm to pass, why not learn how to dance in the rain? In loving, I made a lot of mistakes and not just simple mistakes but terrible ones. Also because of love, I matured. I learned how to control myself and be aware of my surroundings. I realized that life shouldn’t be wasted on one thing alone. Because of uncontrolled emotions, a lot of things happened in my life, both good and bad, and that is why I consider loving to be the best AND the worst thing that I ever did.